Think of it this way!

If life gives you lemons, eat them; you'll be starving soon.

Reigning Cats and Dogs.

By the time the man got to the vet, the dog was dead. The veterinarian said, "I'm sorry, your dog is dead." The man would not believe him, so the vet asked the man if he wanted him to do the cat test. The man said, "Oh yes, anything, try anything." At that a door opened and in walked a cat. The cat walked all the way around the table the dog was on, paused for a moment, and finally shook his head no. The vet said, "I'm sorry, we both know your poor dog is dead." Then the vet said there was one more thing he could try. He said he would bring in the Labrador, and the man eagerly agreed. The Labrador did the same as the cat, shook his head and walked out. The man said, "Well I guess I just have to accept this, what do I owe you?" The vet told him the total would be $550. The man just lost it. Incredulous, he demanded, "For what? He was dead when I brought him in!" The vet said, "Well you only owe me $50, but it's $300 for the cat scan and $200 for the Lab test." Submitted by Steve Newbauer

Land of the Trids

Every morning the Trids got up, ate breakfast, and marched over the bridge to Tridville to work. One morning, a troll moved in under the bridge. When the Trids tried to cross the bridge, the troll climbed up and kicked the Trids all the way back to their homes. The Trids decided to take the day off in hopes that the troll would go away, but the next morning the troll once again climbed up onto the bridge and kicked them back to their homes. In desperation, the Trids decided to ask the Rabbi for help. So the next morning the Rabbi walked across the bridge several times but never saw the troll. He went home believing the troll had indeed moved on. When the Trids tried to cross the bridge afterward, the troll climbed up again and kicked the Trids back home. The Rabbi returned to the bridge and called out for the troll. When the troll appeared, the Rabbi asked why he was allowed to cross the bridge but not the Trids. The troll replied, "Silly Rabbi, kicks are for Trids." Submitted by Mark Crawford

Dilbert and the End of the Internet

Click Here

Out Demons of Stupidity

Homer's Brain!

Period....................................................

Check out the periodic chart for the internet. This is very clever.Periodic Chart for the Internet

Benvolio Files

After seeing a wonderful production of Romeo and Juliet at the OSF (Oregon Shakespeare Festival) I have developed a theory. In short - it is a conspiracy launched by Benvolio and Rosalind. By the end of the play Benvolio is the only young member of both families still alive. Just think, he gets all the attention, all the presents at Christmas, all the inheritance. Wow. Romeo dead, Mercutio dead, Juliet dead, Tybalt dead. He's got it going on. And Rosalind. They say there's nothing like a woman scorned. She must have been really happy to have gotten awayh from Romeo when she did.

Travel odd

Two boys on a trip to Maui spotted cows while driving around the island of Maui. One of the boys remarked, "Look! There are cows in Maui! I didn't know they had cows on Maui"
The other boy responded, "Of course they do, where do you think they get pork..... duh...".

Too Funny for words.

clipped from: www.thehumorarchives.com
So Bob, where's that 8 inches you promised me last night?
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This had most of the state of Michigan laughing for 2 days and a very embarrassed female news anchor who will, in the future, likely think before she speaks. What happens when you predict snow but don't get any.... true story...

A female news anchor who, the day after it was supposed to have snowed and didn't, turned to the weatherman and asked....

"So Bob, where's that 8 inches you promised me last night?" Not only did HE have to leave the set, but half the crew did too they were laughing so hard

Fireworks at Disneyland

Watch Fireworks at Disneyland